Understanding too many principles, yet still unable to live this life well.
In the morning, I had no work today and got up late. It was almost 11:00 when I got up.
Recently, on a certain day, the second child got two last places in learning. In second grade math, they scored 93 and made 12 mistakes in Chinese, coming in second to last with 7 mistakes.
I might have expressed some thoughts that indirectly criticized her mother's educational measures.
So today, I need to take responsibility for tutoring the child for a while. I'll also handle the cooking.
While cooking, I thought about how to optimize things. I looked back and saw the second child still playing while doing the test. Their attention was not focused. They weren't serious, and similar admonitions about their lack of concentration had been too many and ineffective. They don't listen, and even when they do, it doesn't last long. I also didn't want to simply repeat reminders.
Suddenly, a light bulb went off; I realized that choice is greater than effort. I used to think this only applied to significant matters, but at this moment, I understood.
I told the child that choice is greater than effort. The child's mother shushed me, thinking I was making some impractical statement again. It sounded good, just like many paid knowledge platforms, such as getting knowledge, which can be inspiring, but when returning to reality, it remains the same.
I ignored her and continued, saying that choice is about how you decide to do things now—whether to focus on doing homework or to play while studying. It may seem like you're working hard, but it's very laborious; ten minutes of homework takes half an hour to finish. In the future, when you play games, you also have to do other things, like watching videos, simultaneously. As long as it's something that makes you happy, you must do it while doing something else; never focus solely on one thing.
After saying this, I went back to cooking and saw the second child starting to write seriously. I took a phone call, and when I returned, I saw the child shaking their head. I thought they were playing again, so I found a stick to prepare to scold them. When I got closer, I realized they were still seriously doing their homework, so I casually placed the stick on the shoe cabinet behind them and continued cooking.
While cooking, I was thinking about examples and recalled the ancient texts about hermit crabs and earthworms. They also represent the results of choice and effort. The ancient poem about hermit crabs is scorned, while earthworms are admired.
Note
The earthworm has no claws or teeth, yet its muscles and bones are strong. It feeds on soil and drinks from the yellow spring, focusing solely on one thing. The crab has six legs and two claws; it has nowhere to rely on but the hole of a snake or eel, being restless in its focus.
During dinner, I asked the second child who was stronger, the hermit crab or the earthworm. The child said, of course, the hermit crab. I told them how both lived in the ancient texts, and they thought the hermit crab was a parasite. However, they still found crabs to be beautiful. Haha. As long as they understand the principle, that's enough.
Choice is about making small choices that gradually lead to significant choices; without accumulating small steps, one cannot reach a thousand miles. When teaching small children, if we use thought instead of emotion, it might have some effect. Of course, I won't give up on using force, haha. It's a small step in practice.